Impounded

There's a script to be written and one of the plot points
Should be about a precious, but illicit cargo
Contraband, now impounded on the big stuck boat

An act of God, force majeure clauses
Call it Waiting for Godot in Suez
Imagine a duel with high stakes
Not a tale of pirates but a test of wits
Not on the high seas but on the canal
Not an action heist, not that kind of drama
But rather hardboiled, the theater of the absurd
And, in the background, the big stuck boat

The backstory would involve General Sisi's fixer
Four dodgy salvage agents and a claims adjuster
The Japanese owners would be cracking the whip
Ratcheting up the tension as their deadlines slip
On the one side the supply chain enforcers
On the other the logistics operators
And via diplomatic channels, Bonecutter bin Salman
And we'll cut away often to the big stuck boat

Throw in a Moslem Brotherhood angle
A few bellydancers to ramp up the tension
Bond shouldn't be the only one to have gratuitous fun
But in this tale there are no villains
Or, rather, everyone gets their comeuppance
For no one ever paid their soul insurance
The premiums due, to free the big stuck boat

Let's pitch it to Netflix or one of the majors
It's provocative and edgy but still heartwarming
We'll bring in Roddy Doyle to doctor the script
Or Irvine Welsh if you insist on a counterintuitive premise
The fresh take on age old issues will seal the deal
And ultimately, at the climax, we'll have the big reveal
The reversal of fortune occurs on the big stuck boat

There'll be multiple seasons worth, just think: containers!
We'll be taking meetings next, all we need is an agent
They should be hungry these days, the pandemic's got Hollywood idled
Remember you heard it all here first, this scribe's for hire
On the ground floor of the dream factory, the idea production line
The chief toli monger with the crystal ball and batik print
And it all happened, it was written, on the big stuck boat

Big Stuck Boat, a playlist

A soundtrack for this note (spotify version)

• Don't Rock the Boat by Midnight Star & Whodini
• Get on the Boat by Prince
• When my Dreamboat Comes Home by Jimmy Smith
• Stuck by Norah Jones
• Rock the Boat by The Hues Corporation

...

Timing is everything
Observers are worried

See also Soul Inspiration

File under: humour, whimsy, imagination, culture, observation, fun, fiction, Observers are worried, toli

Writing log: May 7, 2021